“I remember so many days that should have been great days, when I’ve got home, slumped into a chair and thought, ‘I just hate this and I hate myself.’ I was completely beaten by it. I let it get to me and it just took over. Until you’ve been through it, you can’t imagine how bad it is.”
– New Zealand batsman Lou Vincent on his struggle with depression.

“I’ll be sitting in Maui with a couple of pina coladas.”
– Paul Roos when asked if he will be coaching the AFL’s western Sydney team mooted for 2012.

“I didn’t like the behaviour of the England hooker. I don’t even want to remember his name. He was ridiculous and grotesque.”
– French rugby coach Marc Lievremont on Mark Regan’s delayed line-out throws.

“It’s not the sort of rugby I enjoy. It’s too much like sevens. There’s too much kicking and counterattacking and not enough set pieces.”
 – Springbok halfback Fourie du Preez on the Super 14’s new laws. Exactly, more scrums and less of that boring counterattacking.

“I don’t really give a s***, to be honest.”
– Queensland Roar coach Frank Farina’s response when asked who will win the A-League grand final … minutes after the Roar were eliminated in the major semi.

“There’s no sort of logical sense to what a player’s worth. I can’t see a pattern.”
– Andrew Symonds after being “bought” for $1.47 million per season by Hyderabad. Ricky Ponting went to Kolkata for a tick over $400,000.

“This MCG wicket has more bounce than a Baywatch beach sprint.”
– Damien Fleming on a recent Australia v India day-nighter. Clearly taking tips from Kerry O’Keeffe ...

“Coming from Germany, I’m not very experienced with Mad Mondays.”
– Central Coast Mariner Andre Gumprecht defends his appearance at a Mad Monday celebration dressed as Adolf Hitler.

“The guy should never play again. People will always use the excuse that he’s not a dirty player and that he didn’t mean it. It’s like a guy who kills one time in his life. You still have a dead person.”
– Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger on the challenge from Birmingham’s Martin Taylor that left his striker Eduardo da Silva with a double leg fracture.

“What’s that sticking out of his sock? It’s his ankle, it’s his ankle … He once had silky skills, now he walks like Heather Mills … He used to run down the left, he used to run down the right, now that boy Eduardo he’ll be walking in circles for life …”
 – The chant of Aston Villa fans when they played Arsenal a week after Eduardo da Silva was hobbled. How low can fans go?

“These kids come into a culture of drinking and playing up and they’re expected to have the tools to deal with it all. If someone starts their career in a culture like that, they’re fighting a losing battle.”
– Ivan Henjak on his nephew Matt’s drunken punch that left Force team-mate Haig Sare with a broken jaw. See, it’s the culture’s fault.

“I feel like a mosquito in a nudist colony. I know what to do, I just don’t know where to start.”
– Miami coach Pat Riley after the Heat ended their 11-game losing streak against Sacramento Kings.

“I fell asleep about half-time.”
– Waratah’s five-eighth Kurt Beale on why he couldn’t watch a replay of his missed goal that saw the Waikato Chiefs edge a three-point win.

“He might be in the Mardi Gras this week, because I’m sick of tapping that arse. It’s true. I’ll tap it again if he wants.”
– Who else but Anthony Mundine on Danny Green.

“Choc is a bit like an ex-wife who is still screaming out after getting a big pay out.”
– Danny Green’s response. Reckon he sounds just a tad weary of this slanging match?

“It’s been a bit of a long battle with Harbhajan. The first time I ever met him, he was the same little obnoxious weed that he is now.”
– In case anyone out there was unsure, Matthew Hayden does not like Harbhajan Singh.

“I like the idea of actually getting into the ring with him. I like that, bring it on.”
– Hayden isn’t fond of Ishant Sharma, either.

“I’m a great believer that if you’re not playing in the tournament, you can’t win.”
– Colin Montgomerie on the US Masters.

“If you took the goals out of it, I think it was pretty even.”
– West Ham boss Alan Curbishley on Chelsea’s 4-0 demolition of the Hammers.

“I wouldn’t put my house on it. I’ve worked too hard over 35 years to get a house.”
– Celtic boss Gordon Strachan on the chances of beating Barcelona at the Nou Camp.

“The referee was punching the air when they scored.”
– Crystal Palace manager Neil Warnock suggests – ever so subtly – that referee Richard Beeby just might have been favouring Bristol City in their one-all draw.

“I am extremely proud.”
– Bermuda women’s cricket captain Linda Mienzer after her side was bowled out by South Africa for 13, 10 of them extras.

“We have youngsters in the side who will learn all these arts. I think it is an art. You have to be good at it.”
– Indian ODI captain MS Dhoni on sledging. And the Aussies are always the culpable party?

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