We couldn’t resist … they got beaten by Bangladesh!
What’s the difference between a tea bag and the English cricket team?
A tea bag stays in the cup longer.
When would an English cricketer ever have 100 runs against his name?
When he is bowling.
What’s the England version of LBW?
Lost. Beaten. Walloped.
What did the cricket fan miss when he went to the bar?
The entire England innings.
What do you call an Englishman who’s good with a bat?
Who has the easiest job in the English cricket squad?
The person who removes the red ball marks from the bats.
What does an Englishman put in his hands to guarantee there’s a wicket next ball?
What is the height of optimism?
An English batsman putting on sunscreen.
What is the main function of the English cricket coach?
To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.
Why don’t English fielders need pre-tour travel injections?
Because they never catch anything.
What advantage does Eoin Morgan have over his team-mates?
At least he can say he’s not English.